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Mentoring and Coaching - A Powerful Way to Change Behaviour: Personal Story by John French. Executive Chairman at Subscribe-HR During the 80s and early 90’s I was running Management Development programmes for large Corporations and Government. One of the best and more enjoyable segments of the program was story telling, where each participant had to recount an experience that changed their behaviour in a significant way and had a major impact on their management style. Everyone loves a story. Our parents used to tell us stories when we were young and we all remember listening intently and with great anticipation about the characters the plot and the outcomes. Today the art of story telling has largely disappeared replaced by games, electronic gadgets and only the odd book read before bedtime by parents who see the wisdom of story telling. No surprise therefore that story telling in the adult world still plays a significant role. My story begins at the end of the 70s in my very first job in the commercial sector. I had just graduated from University. By chance I went to a function where I sat next to the GM of a major construction company. By the end of the night I was offered the Position of HR Manager and asked to contact him the next day to discuss the terms. A big role for a raw graduate; who knew a lot about a little. In truth, the role was way beyond my knowledge and experience. The challenge, however, was dwarfed by the salary package, which included a car. Dazzled by the money “I said yes” of course. It was going to drag me out of poverty. Within 6 weeks of starting my new role, which reported directly to the MD, he asked me to come into his office “at 7.30 the next morning”. I had been into his office many times. This was different. I had a gut feeling about it and it wasn’t good. After an uncomfortable nights sleep I fronted up the next morning not knowing what to expect. After the usual pleasantries we sat down at his working table. His office was always tidy and organised. He started by saying “ I want to talk to you about your performance” and “give you some feedback”. “How do you think you are going” he asked? I edged my bets and talked about problems and progress. He then told me he wanted to focus on 2 areas that he believed he could help improve; one was time management the other delegation. I immediately became defensive. This was a new experience for me and I was feeling exposed. No one had ever discussed my weaknesses with me in such an open and brutal way. He again emphasised that he was here to help me, he told me he saw huge potential in me, that’s why he hired me but the deficiencies were quite obvious. He gave me examples of poor Time Management and Delegation on how that was impacting on my efficiency and output. It is hard to argue with facts so I took it on board. He said to me “ this is what we are going to do”. “For the next 2 weeks we are going to meet every morning at 7.30”. “Bring your diary and a note book and we are going to sit together and plan our respective days,” he said. I want to teach how to prioritise properly. Every morning for 2 weeks we did exactly that. We generated to do lists, talked about what was urgent and important, what to leave alone and how to move big projects along. At the end of the 2 weeks he said to me ‘ I think you’ve got it.” Now we can focus on Delegation. He showed me the difference between abdication, close supervision and true delegation where responsibility for the decision and the implementation of the decision is turned over to the person you are delegating to. “That is true delegation” he said to me. Within a month we were no longer meeting. He said “the rest you will pick up on your own”. Months later I asked him “why did you go out of your way to help me. He said, “It’s my job” “that’s what effective management is all about”. If you become better at your job” “I become better at my job”. What a refreshing idea! He went on to say, “the way you can pay me back is to help your staff the way I helped you. “That’s how we are going to improve the organisation and our people”. I have told the same story hundreds of times in the hope that people would say to me. “ I have had a similar experience”. Sadly only very few have been fortunate to have shared the power of “one on one” coaching. I always hope that telling the story will inspire other managers to get involved in coaching and mentoring. What is your Story? Source: Subscribe-HR Executive Chairman: John French Disclaimer: Links to third-party web sites are provided for your convenience only. Subscribe-HR does not endorse nor support the content of third-party links. Subscribe-HR is not responsible for the content of a third-party web site. 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